The Loving List for Black Women

Reminders to prioritize YOURSELF every day

Jeanette C. Espinoza


Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash

Black women…how do we love ourselves?

So many online posts and videos encourage Black women to love and nurture themselves, but for many of us, this is easier said than done.

Between caring for children, aging parents, nurturing romantic relationships, work, school, dream-chasing, and staying on top of what everyday life brings all while presenting as Black women can be overwhelming, to say the LEAST.

While we often create safe nurturing spaces for ourselves, this society does not view Black women as beings who need regular TLC.

Adjectives such as strong, independent, fearless, and boss are often attributed to us, and rightfully so because let’s face it, Sis, we are all of those things rolled into one.

But the problem with these beautiful words affirming our ability to be capable, functioning adults is they leave little room for vulnerability.

As Black women, we have more than earned the right to submit to being tired and REST without guilt.

We have earned the right to allow others to HELP us meet our daily demands and not kill ourselves trying to do it all alone.

We have earned the right to expect that we are worthy enough to receive the benefits provided so generously to women of other ethnicities at their first signs of struggle.

However, since a Black woman’s well-being is not first on the list of America’s priorities, we must take matters into our own hands and remain consistent with our unapologetic and unrelenting self-love practices.

Here are a few suggestions to help keep your cup full at all times:

  • REST — There is an amazing book called Rest is Resistance that my beautiful daughter blessed me with. If you haven’t read it, I would encourage you to devote some quiet time to indulge. It’s a gentle reminder of how vital it is for us to rest without feelings of guilt. Real rest requires a complete unplugging from your obligations and placing an unconditional focus on YOU. It is not a selfish act — it is self-preservation. It is also necessary for the rejuvenation of your mind, body, and spirit. As we all know, moving…



Jeanette C. Espinoza

Mom of 2 amazing humans | Author of 3 books, including Rock Your Crown -| Speaker | Activist | Creator of Jeanette’s Jewels